


she's always a woman

by littlevodika



Series: star wars fanfiction/reader inserts [4]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Asajj Beats Your Ass Once, Depictions of Sex, Established Relationship, Exhibitionist?, F/F, Kinda Domestic Abuse?, Kinky Padmé Amidala, Mild Sexual Content, More Than One Established Relationship, Sexy Times, Song: She's Always A Woman, Togruta (Star Wars), Togruta!Reader - Freeform, sexy space senator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:14:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23836702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlevodika/pseuds/littlevodika
Summary: when you fall for two equally strong but polar opposite women, you did your best to keep the romance away, even though your heart was known to be larger than your montrals. you loved them quite differently, but you couldn’t deny the fact that they both had pieces of your heart. whether that’s a good thing remains to be seen.
Relationships: Asajj Ventress/Reader, Padmé Amidala/Reader
Series: star wars fanfiction/reader inserts [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1695919
Kudos: 31





	she's always a woman

**Author's Note:**

> based on the billy joel song by the same name, this is a deep dive into my affections for my precious senator (and more recently, asajj)
> 
> warnings: i tried to keep the sex talk to a minimum but i still wanted it to read sexy so idk how this is gonna work. asajj goes ape shit and i guess abuses you? that may not be the right word
> 
> changed canon details: the jedi code doesn’t have as big a stick up its ass when it comes to sex & romance, but romance is still discouraged. also, i like the idea of asajj being grey after dooku leaves her for dead, whether it’s canon or not

it was a good day, for being on tatooine. there was far less wind blowing, which kept the sand out of your eyes but offered less relief from the blistering suns. there was less of a burn in your lungs than the polluted coruscanti air as you walked along the side streets, but it could never be as clean as the air on shili.

you ran into her while poking around the slums, sent to find the lightsaber of an old friend that had been taken to the black market. you didn’t want it to fall into the hands of someone that wasn’t his padawan, it was the least he deserved.

“are your disguises getting weaker, darling, or were you hoping to be found?” she spoke through the force, and you could hear the smirk in her words without even seeing her. the force told you where to go to find the dathomirian, slouched on the back wall of a seedy nightclub.

“i’m thinking the latter, or else we’ll be running into trouble soon. what brings you here?”  
“the same thing that always does: a job.”

nodding in understanding, you projected the “don’t notice us” as strong as you could to anyone outside of the woman in front of you, hoping that no one sees a jedi conversing with the “sith” assassin. no one else knows about dooku’s betrayal besides you, dooku, and herself.

asajj could sense the change in the force and grinned at you. “you want to protect me? i’m flattered, darling. that doesn’t mean it isn’t weak.”

_she can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes_  
_she can ruin your faith with her casual lies_

she said things like that a lot, sometimes seeming to play with the idea of killing you. you never truly know if it’s her own form of foreplay or whether she genuinely wants to murder you. in a fight you two had several months ago, she said there was very little stopping her from taking your head to the hutts, and that she’d not object to taking the one million credits payment for the head of a jedi.

your response would always be the same: you hand her your sabers and get on your knees in front of her, your chin tilted upward to tempt her. her excuse for not doing it would consist of blaming the venomous bite of the togruta for keeping her sedated to the point of compliance (your species never denied the claims made centuries ago that togrutans were venomous, it kept a certain air about you that you rather enjoyed).

that night, like many others when you ran into your assassin, ended with the two of you fucking, this time on one of the most uncomfortable beds on tatooine. it was always rough with asajj, and you would be lying if you said it wasn’t pleasant.

when the two of you were spent, she would usually leave the bed and do anything but lay with you in the afterglow. but this time, you were lucky enough to have overexerted the grey force user and she was putty in your hands. you sense peace coming from her in a way that you’ve never felt from her when fully awake.

_and she only reveals what she wants you to see_  
_she hides like a child but she's always a woman to me_

those nights are extremely rare, and you drink them in until they nearly consume you. you’d never tell her this, but when she sleeps you can feel the light side of the force trying to bring her back. it gave you hope for the woman asajj could be now that she has left the sith.

she’s enchanting. part of you wants to open your heart, to submit yourself completely to her, but you knew what she could do with power. you’ve faced her more than once on the battlefield, and though you hate to admit it, there is no guarantee that she wouldn’t use your vulnerabilities against you.

_she can lead you to love, she can take you or leave you_  
_she can ask for the truth but she'll never believe you_

you suspect that asajj enjoys your relationship -if you can even call it that- because it’s all a sexy, twisted game to her. she may think that she’s taking advantage of a jedi, but that’s not the case. you genuinely care about asajj, and she gives you room in her bed because she believes she’s taking so much more.

_and she'll take what you give her as long as it's free_  
_yeah she steals like a thief but she's always a woman to me_

those thoughts are quieted when you and she are at your loudest, all of the pent-up adrenaline seeping into your bites and scratches and bruises caused by hard-gripping fingertips.

————

you always wait a while after being with asajj before returning to coruscant. with a quick holomessage to the council, you would make an excuse to warrant the detour, usually to provide aid to the occasional struggling troops. you weren’t lying because you did go where you said you would, but it wasn’t your main motive.

the moment asajj’s markings on you were either gone or you were covered in enough bruises from battle to write them off, you were right back to coruscant to be with your senator.

you and padmé weren’t exclusive by any means, and she knew you slept with someone else. in the beginning, you could sense the difference in padmé’s mood if she saw lover’s marks from someone that wasn’t her, so you did your best to get them less frequently or spend more time away while they healed. it was unfair of you to have them when you were in her bed and her home.

her bed was the softest in the galaxy and her love was sweet and gentle, but just as sturdy as the montrals atop your head. she was steadfast, more than any woman you’ve ever met. it was comforting, being able to find solace from the horrors of this war in her arms. 

she would let your hands roam her body, using the force to release the knots in her back while you kept your hands busy elsewhere. the way her eyelids fluttered as she moaned your name was a gift from the stars, a siren telling you to keep going, that you couldn’t survive without hearing her song.

_oh, she takes care of herself,_  
_she can wait if she wants_  
_she's ahead of her time_

there have been occasions, however, when all she wanted was a way to release all of the chaos and stress the senate causes onto you, being possessive and demanding, so unlike the padmé you knew.

the first time it happened, you were so shocked that it was alarmingly easy for her to bring you into submission. padmé relished in the fact she had one of the most powerful beings in the galaxy begging for her touch, for release. she brought a jedi to their knees, reduced you to a whimpering, moaning mess.

you’d feel the power rolling in waves from her and you’d be intoxicated by the intensity. padmé was excellent at taking charge.

no matter how the night played out, padmé would always want to be in your arms after sharing her bed with you. you enjoyed these nights as well; being a jedi could be lonely, long missions without your women wore on your psyche. she would make her own trails along the patterns of your skin, every detail being cemented into her memory.

_oh, she never gives out and she never gives in_  
_she just changes her mind_

as she held you, her chin would slightly rest between your montrals, one hand resting on your chest and the other softly stroking the skin of you lekku. no one besides her ever showed you that sort of affection and you would bathe in it, never wanting to leave her chambers.

the next morning, you’d make her breakfast (you loved her dearly, but padmé was a terrible cook) and she would come behind you, snaking her arms around your waist and peppering soft kisses along your shoulders and lekku. the first time she did it, it made you weak and cost her a couple pieces of china. you’d both eat then spend as long as possible doing next to nothing until duty called, tearing you both away from your little slice of peace.

\--------

_she'll promise you more than the garden of eden_

asajj was quite skilled in the art of persuasion; it fed into her deception at times, but you indulged her just the same.

she’s given food to your thoughts about leaving the order after the war, though you’d never admit that to anyone. “think about it, darling. the two of us, whatever we desire without any fear of repercussions. an entire galaxy in front of us!” her eyes would sparkle as she talked about them, the few worry lines on her face disappearing in an instant.

there were days you indulged in her talks of grandeur, creating stories and aliases for the two of you as you go on imaginary adventures. she’d smile and play along, for whose sake she didn’t know. asajj knew you wouldn’t leave the order for her. you were about to be assigned a padawan by the council and your visits with her would be sparse or ending entirely. it was up to the council, that kriffing council that you chose to subject yourself to.

she remembers when you gave her the news. it was after she had reluctantly stayed in bed with you after a wonderfully loud night. the former sith knew you enjoyed having her there afterwards but asajj had to pace herself. if she did it too often she would begin to grow attached and it would hurt even more when something like this happened.

who was she kidding? if the dathomirian was having to calculate how to not be attached to you, she was already in too deep.

asajj has said nasty things to people and has clearly done far worse than talk. she felt betrayed when you told her the news during breakfast, like you had buttered her up for this long just to break her.

it was the final straw. she should have known better than to trust a jedi! jedi lead to heartache, that’s all she’s ever received from them. you had shoved her into this near-domesticity against her will, and waited until she was actually enjoying it to steal it away!

_then she'll carelessly cut you and laugh while you're bleeding_

you tried to reason with her. it wasn’t your choice, if you had it your way you would never have a padawan, especially in the midst of this foolish war! you’ve known too many jedi that watched their masters die in front of them and it was a pain you never wanted to inflict onto someone so young, someone so filled with life and hope.

“you know that pathetic sob story you told me is a lie! you’ve wanted nothing more than to teach someone the ways of the force, to bring them into the light! that’s the only damned reason you’ve kept up with me for so long!” asajj gestured around you violently, her fury placing the abstract in front of her. “this, this is my life and i’ve accepted it! i’ve accepted my lot! but instead of appreciating who i am, you want to turn me into a jedi!” she spit your title from her lips like bile. she wrapped the force around your throat and you could barely breathe, hands coming up to your throat to pull away at nothing.

“i sense the force around you, how you want so badly for it to wrap around me and take away what the council wouldn’t want to see! to take away my past!” the angrier she was, the worse her grip became. you were levitating now, your feet instinctively trying to touch the ground.

maybe you could get through to her. you weren’t trying to convert her, trying to erase who she was. you loved her! you loved her for who she was, despite the things she’s done!

“asajj, pplease, i-“  
“SILENCE!” she threw you like a rag doll towards the door, your back hitting the wall next to it with a loud thump.

you could feel the fury, the anguish, the heartbreak leaking through your connection in the force and it pained you to be the cause. you were about to apologize but as your mouth opened she slashed at you, her groomed fingernails bringing up blood via two gashes on your cheek. you were so blinded by her outpouring of emotion that you hadn’t even known she’d been so close.

“if i see you again, i will not be this merciful.” asajj has no patience for this as she yells for you to leave before she kills you, malice in every syllable.

tears threaten to spill as you exit, grabbing your goggles from the handlebar of the speeder and driving away from a woman that you probably shouldn’t love.

————

you completed your mission without a hitch (“hitch” to you was defined as a near-death experience, thanks to your times working with anakin skywalker), aching to get back to coruscant, back to padmé. you needed something that resembled peace because your mind was swirling with turmoil. there was still time before you were given a padawan, and your heart can’t handle spending it alone.

you hadn’t bothered with cleaning the wound on your face, the bright orange hue of your blood staining your face before crusting over.

you had your fair share of injuries from the mission itself, but asajj lashing out did take a lot from you physically and emotionally. when you tried to deny a medical evaluation upon landing but couldn’t put up a fight against your commander, it was obvious you needed to go for a visit. he escorted you there, knowing that you had quite the habit of ducking out of the medbay at the last minute.

word had spread that you completed your task and it wove through the political grapevine to padmé, who was insistent on visiting her “dear friend” in the infirmary. after all, the jedi whose ‘saber you retrieved was from naboo, it would be a sign of good will between the jedi and the planet of naboo if she were to visit you.

you could feel her presence onboard long before you were notified, your connection to her a soothing balm combating against your heart- and physical aches.

“general, senator amidala wishes to see you.”  
“well what are you waiting for? send her in, biggs!”

the cmo smirked at your impatient tone but didn’t dare comment on it before going to retrieve the senator.

padmé’s dress flows across the floor, it’s rich violet matching that of your battalion's signature hue. she did it on purpose, you could tell by the light in her eyes as your eyes drank in her figure.

“my dear general,” she began with a tone teetering dangerously on the border of professionalism and affection, “i’m grateful that you were willing to help bring peace to a grieving padawan through your mission. on behalf of naboo, i thank you.”

you were the only one that could see her grin growing as she beefed up the political jargon, thinking that she could have made an excellent holodrama actress if she tried. “it’s my pleasure, senator. i’d do it a thousand times over if it meant to hear your praises every time i returned.” biggs’s eyes were close to bulging out of his head at the blatant flirting, unsure how to proceed. he chose to leave the medbay, which was the smartest thing he could have done.

once the door slid shut behind him, padmé gripped the edges of your jedi robes and pulled you into her, lips feather-light against your own. her breath was sweet like the precious pears found on her home planet and it was intoxicating. you leaned closer to her, desperate for the taste of her on your tongue, but she moved away at the last second with a teasing air.

“i hope you’ve learned to not ignore me when you go on another solo mission, won’t you sweetheart?” fingernails drug across your lekku, the appendage instinctually wrapping around her wrist tightly. she smiled, knowing that your lekku would always betray you at the most inopportune times.

she continued to tease you, hot breath fanning against the skin between lekku and neck as she whispered the ways she had to take care of herself in your absence. it was growing more difficult to contain your arousal, your teeth aching to softly nip at the soft skin of her chest, so exposed by her gown.

she knew exactly what she was doing, and the idea of her showing such affection in public, risking the exposure of your submissive side in front of your subordinates was thrilling. it wouldn’t cause them to lose respect for you by any means, but some would see the senator as a weakness.

padmé made you stronger, she gave you a reason to fight and keeping her safe motivated you to be at your best every second of the day. the war became a labor of love. then there are times like this one, where she’s mumbling dirty thoughts into your montrals and reminding you that she also makes you weaker than anyone in the galaxy.

you give in to your primal desires when you’re alone with her, when her neck is presented to you after breathy moans like a gift from the stars. the fact she’s able to get this reaction from you while this close of your men, to the role of general that you’ve been desperate to keep free of visible weakness, is a testament to the allure of senator padmé amidala.

_she brings out the best and the worst you can be_  
_blame it all on yourself 'cause she's always a woman to me_

biggs re-entered the medbay and only four thoughts went through his head:

1\. senator amidala was getting quite cozy with his general, and- was that a moan he just heard? yes. yes it was. whose it was, there was no telling.  
2\. based on the observations from his first thought, he knew that the two of you have most definitely been intimate with each other on other occasions. the kind of feverish tension in the room wasn’t one that could just show up for a quick, first-time fling.  
3\. was his general a bottom? sure seemed like it, with the way your lekku were flushing and the one wrapped tightly around the senator’s wrist. the basic togrutan anatomy he learned told him that the lekku were delicate and highly sensitive in romantic/sexual situations, and that display of affection was reserved for someone that was implicitly trusted with your life.  
4\. he now needed to research the female anatomy with a bit more detail so he knew how to keep his general (and now the senator by proxy) from catching/passing something to each other.  


the medical officer kept these things in mind, leaving as unknown as he had arrived, hoping he didn’t interrupt you in the short time of his presence.

he knew that your amour existing/being a senator was against the code and probably some rules in the senate, and getting caught by someone that didn’t possess his loyalty to you would be detrimental to yours and the senator’s career. so he took the liberty of banning everyone but your commander and himself from entering your private section of the medbay if they didn’t receive authorization from either himself or you.

padmé didn’t notice the brief presence of the cmo in your room, and to be truthful you almost didn’t notice him either. he was a ghost, saying nothing and quickly taking an exit, but not with a speed that would have alarmed you. biggs was anything but a snitch and you would swear by that till the day you died.

your thoughts were returned to the woman in front of you when her expert lips took the tip of one of your lekku in her mouth, her tongue swirling expertly. surely no one would notice if you kept the senator in your room a bit longer than was scheduled. she had to properly thank you for your service, and it would be a severe act of disrespect if you were to turn down her way of saying thanks. the force hummed around you as you let yourself be enveloped by the love and lust coming from the both of you, general rank be damned.


End file.
